I was going to write about my 20th high school reunion being tomorrow and the fact that I was a complete loser in high school who was bullied a lot, which made me feel even more like a loser until I discovered anti-depressants, retail therapy, men (eventually James) and Miracle bras.
I’m not going to the reunion because I’m afraid those who do attend will be all like…. “What’s SHE doing here? Nobody liked her!” And I’ll wind up sitting at a table alone like in the school lunchroom. And then to compensate, I’ll drink too much and get really sloppy wasted and belligerent and try to start a fight with the guy who used to imitate my lisp and knock my books off my desk. But I’ll be too drunk to fight and wind up falling backward into a ficus tree where I’ll vomit and eventually pass out….