It’s Now Thoughtful (or less, depending on whom you ask) Thursday

Today I’m trying something I’ve seen other bloggers do for years. It’s called Wordless Wednesday…where you post a bunch of random photos that supposedly represent your life….on a Wednesday. (That was so yesterday.)

Some bloggers only include photos that make their lives seem like one endless girls’ night with spa pedicures and highlighter colored cocktails and a glamorous job that they never work at. When do they do laundry? and wait in line at the DMV?

They’re not all like that, though. I once saw a Wordless Wednesday where the blogger posted photos of her skin tags and lesions, asking her readers for dermatological advice. I applaud her resourcefulness in the self help category.

Oh shoot, this is already too wordy to be called wordless. And it’s going to get worse because I can’t conceive of posting photos without captions.
Here goes…..an honest snapshot of my life and all of its trivialities.
We live in a time where camera scopes can be threaded into tubes that easily snake through people’s large intestines. And from the depths of your colon that video can be simultaneously displayed to a group of medical students three continents away. Just wrap your brain around that. Why the crap, hasn’t someone invented pads that don’t bunch up inside the cups of your bathing suit top?
I FINALLY sold that God forsaken Oriental rug that I thought would follow me to my grave. Yes, it’s the same one you’ve seen me advertise many times on FaceBook. The one that smells like a rest home for incontinent felines. I was so nervous that the buyer was going to get a whiff of the stench and back out. But I realized that she was God-sent when we loaded it into her truck, which reeked of cigarette smoke.
My favorite headline of the day. Maybe of the week. Maybe, like, EVER. Do you think the woman got drunk before or after she stole the snake? Do you think in court she could use the “Just-like-Eve-I-didn’t-realize-the-snake-was-Satan-and-he-told-me-to-do-it.” defense?
Looks like Jack inherited the super-strong, Hall family nearsighted genes. Yesterday, he became a contact lens wearer.  “Mom, I’m gonna need more ‘sailing solution.'” I was hoping only one eye would be affected and we could buy him a monocle to wear on one of those fancy chains, like European archdukes in the 1800’s. And he could wear jackets with gold tassel shoulder pads and grow a handle bar mustache. Probably wouldn’t be so convenient for baseball.
At the same optometrist visit, Andrew had his eyes dilated. These sunglasses give him a debonair combination of Jackie O. and “3D movie viewer. ” And they’re so much cheaper than Oakleys.
When I whined that the boys were spending too much time on their devices and needed to learn some real games, this wasn’t exactly what I had in mind. But I guess it’s not a problem until the sterling silver disappears. (who am I kidding? I pawned that years ago!)
Decorating: Four wall plates. Fourteen nail holes. And they’re STILL not right!!!!
James in his home office. Sometimes he lets me visit him. But only in five minute increments.

And I declared victory over the backyard yellow jackets. C-4 is officially my new favorite thing. Thanks, Pinterest!!!!

The neighbors have had a crew of combative, hard-of-hearing Mexicans seemingly rebuilding their house from the ground up for the past two weeks. They scream at each other in Spamish all day long.

 I started making up my own Latino Construction soap opera, in which brick mason Javier wants to kill roofer Jose Abreau because he caught him with his Abuela Rosita. And then I remembered that abuela means grandma. And while daydreaming, I should’ve been doing the dishes because Andrew was eating yogurt with a fork.

Cali gazes out the window at the Constructiones Latinos all day long. I think she dreams of being a carpenter.

Meanwhile Anakin lies on his back all day, staring at shampoo bottles in the shower. I really should do more to entertain them.

Advertisements

About angelaweight

Awkward, imperfect, ADD wife to tightly wound financial planner, mom of two boys, and rescuer of lucky stray animals. I should probably see a therapist rather than write a blog. But hopefully I can offer a few laughs along the way.
This entry was posted in Wordless Wednesday and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to It’s Now Thoughtful (or less, depending on whom you ask) Thursday

  1. Katie says:

    OH I bet you are a hoot to hang out with! I've really enjoyed reading through some of your posts tonight. I'll be back for more…Welcome to Richmond!

    Like

  2. Aw, thanks, Katie! You just made my day!!!

    Like

  3. NC Sue says:

    “Wearing a stolen snake”???
    Really???
    I want to invite you to the new home of Wordless Wednesday (on Tuesday) at http://image-in-ing.blotspot.com/ each week at midnight Tuesday, EST. And you're welcome to share your blog button for your recurring link-up at the page devoted to Wordless linkups – just remember to use your main blog url rather than a link to an individual post.

    Like

Leave a comment, pretty please...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s